Me, in a cattle car (we think that's what it was anyway...) in the middle of a cow impersonation. I was taking the train somewhere in Germany or Austria - can't exactly remember. I think this was my second year in college. One of my best friends and I were going car to car looking for seats and somehow ended up here. It was really funny and we were goofing around taking pictures. Traveling can be so much fun.
I have been fortunate enough to have the opportunity of traveling to several countries so far in my life. I did a few missions trips with my youth group during high school. Really meaningful trips to Mexico and Costa Rica that taught me about how fortunate we are to have everything that we do. A month long college trip touring Germany with my German class that was really awesome. But none can probably hold a candle in terms of personal growth to the three months I went over to Germany by myself to work. And I think the key to this was that I was by myself.
I had so many close friends in youth group that going out of the country on a missions trip (no matter how hard the environment or the work) was just plain touching and fun. I can't remember being nervous, only excited. Going to Germany for a month with my college class was a little bit more outside of my comfort zone. It was a longer trip and I did not know these kids as well. It meant leaving my boyfriend for a month. But nonetheless we had an awesome time together - lots of history and lots of crazy fun (maybe too crazy at times...). Had the privilege to learn the story of my college professor whose family fled from East Germany when she was 5 years old. I am still amazed at the part where she was told to run to a bar and sleep there for the night by herself and then use a payphone to call the number she had on a scrap piece of paper for her aunt to come get her the following morning. Being able to spend a few nights with families on the East and West side and learning their personal stories as well. New Year's Eve in an abandoned building, 5 stories high, crawling with people and an open bar and DJ on every floor .... all waiting for the bus afterwards at about 4am in the freezing cold and then realizing that oh yea, they don't run that late and slowly finding our way back to the youth hostel from there. A few shenanigans with one of my best friends who got to come visit me at the end of the trip. We got to go to the mountains in Austria and spend a few days in a cabin there. I could go on and on. It was a really enriching trip for many reasons. Great memories.
After college, I had the opportunity to travel to Germany and work for three months. It seemed like a no brainer, when would I ever be able to do this again? Although it meant leaving family, friends and a serious boyfriend behind for the duration. In the grand scheme of things, 3 months is not long at all - but when you are in your early twenties and so many things are developing in your life, it can seem like a really long time to be gone. A lonely 8 hour plane ride over (not including a layover) was too much time to sit and let my mind wander! I remember sitting there thinking ... hmmm, what have I gotten myself into?? Let's hope I can do this! Thankfully, I have always had strong gut feelings. If it feels right, I let it play out and I have never been disappointed. This felt right. So no matter how hard it was, I was going to let it play out. I tried to sleep so that when I arrived the following morning German time, I would be able to withstand the full day ahead of me - but my mind was racing! I had studied the German language and culture since I was in 6th grade, actually graduated with a Bachelor's degree, double majoring in German and Business. Still, I think when you have studied a language enough to know most of the minute details - you also are aware of every mistake that you may make and so you are very hesitant to consider yourself "fluent". I always shy away from that term. And my goodness, there are so many dialects in that country - it is amazing.
So I arrived, got my luggage and then had to take a train south to be picked up by a colleague and then driven to the apartment where I was to live. I wasn't paying as close of attention as I should have been and I missed getting off to catch my proper train connection. I thought the ride was seeming long and then I heard the next stop announced on the train and panic set in. I grabbed my things, rushed to someone who was working on the train and they stopped at the next stop to let me off so that I could find my way back. I did not have a cell phone to call the gentleman who was picking me up, did not even know his cell phone number at that time (how insane is that?). Only had office numbers. So I am already late, in the wrong city and frantically trying to call someone - anyone - at the office even though it is almost after hours and I don't know who would still be at their desk in order to contact this poor man and let him know I will be (well, already was) late. Finally succeeded and rushed over to hop on the correct train. Whew - what an embarrassing start to this journey!
It's interesting being 'the foreigner'. And I don't mean a tourist, or even a student - I mean actually plugging yourself into daily life in a different country for an extended period of time. I lived with a family that to my knowledge, did not speak one word of English. They were very reserved and had three children, only one of which was still living at home. They read papers, were very artsy, yet very shy actually and were hospitable to me - even though I was quite different from them. It was really nice to be living with them and not on my own. They made an effort to take me places on those early weekends where I did not know enough people to have any plans. Even though I had my own space because they actually owned two apartments and the intent was to let me be on my own, they still included me in all of their daily meals and activities as if I was a foreign exchange student of sorts. That was a blessing.
Work was a challenge for sure! The job itself was not hard. The only opening they had for me was to be the secretary to the owner of the company, I was filling in for a maternity leave. She was there maybe half of one day to give me a few pointers and then gone. But hierarchy is important there and he was important and there were a lot of questions left unanswered before she left. What can you do, I had to just learn on my own by making mistakes. In those early days, every time the phone would ring I would get nervous - hoping that I would understand everything that was being said on the other line and that I could also know enough about the company, my boss and the job to handle the topic of conversation! I remember one sweet woman (the only other woman on our floor) coming into my office that first week. The phone rang and I explained to her my fear. She told me very matter of factly "No, no, no - don't you be afraid to speak - you just stop them - tell them to speak clearly and slowly because German is your second language and that is that." That was great advice - get rid of the fear, jump in and do this. Who cares what other people think, you are here to learn. And I tried to take that attitude with me. But you always have your moments.
They gave me a company car and the first day I drove home, I missed a turn, got lost and ended up in a different town! Then I was barreling down these tiny roads trying to make sense of where the heck I was and where the heck I needed to go (no cell phone, no gps!). I always figured it out eventually - but it did frazzle me every time! I think when your nerves are already shot - these little things can rattle you all the more. Who was really there to help me? No one really. Everyone was a stranger. That was kind of cool though, you learn what you are capable of - you take time to notice things without distraction. It was a great experience.
I had gone through a couple of days, still learning the ropes at work and still dealing with the language and cultural barriers - and woke up one morning feeling totally drained. I did not feel like going into work and facing all of that again. It is surprisingly mentally and physically draining. In spite of that - I got up, got myself ready, got into my car and prayed the entire 40 min drive into work. Came to the conclusion that even if I messed up what felt like all the time with work or wording or not catching a joke or not knowing my job well enough yet - that I would make it my mission to get to know the people here and to let them get to know me. I wanted to leave an impression on them of who I was - not worrying about what I could or couldn't do well. Of course I would continue to try my very best at bettering my work, my speech, etc., I would try to not let that hinder my relationships. This was the game changer in my trip. And boy oh boy did it open my eyes to the kindness and goodness of human nature - no matter where you are in the world.
I'm sure I gave them a little grief - one night while out late with a coworker's daughter, I botched the side of the company car driving out of a parking structure. It was terrifying walking into work the next day with my tail between my legs. The two men I reported to ended up laughing, keeping it a secret from everyone else and then telling me after I got home that another worker took the car out, came back complaining up and down about the scratches and they said, "well you must have done it, since you were out with the car, right?" haha. He didn't get in trouble, obviously - but it was humorous that they had my back so to speak.
I came to know the owner of the company quite well and he (a man of about 65) ended up inviting me to go to an old ski cabin where he was meeting up with a university ski club he had been a part of years ago and before that his father had been a part of. When I pulled in to park at his home - he had told me where exactly to park my car and it was this tiny little spot that was on the steepest DECLINE you have ever seen. In front of this decline was a cement wall. So pulling into the spot wasn't so bad, but pulling out of it without bashing the cement wall in front of it was impossible for me to do in a manual car!!! Oh my gosh, did I sit there and try for what felt like eternity (sweating bullets mind you as this is not my car) while he watched, until I got out and made him help! We went to the cabin and he introduced me to many kids around my own age and we all ate and talked and then he had me come back to he and his wife's home to spend the night. He also invited me on a business trip with him to Switzerland, where we spent a few days at a convention. I think he took to me as a daughter of sorts. My goodness I (yet again) got lost on my way to meet him. I was so turned around that I flew into this park n ride just fuming. I was banging the steering wheel and probably yelling some choice words when I spot him in his Mercedes, observing the entire scene! I quietly got into his car and he simply said in an amused voice, "everything ok?". Total humiliation!!! We had a fun trip and at one point during the convention he told me to just get out of there and go shopping. Go check out the town. What a neat opportunity.
Among other wonderful things I was invited to go horseback riding in France with another coworker's entire family. This was funny because apparently horses there respond to English style commands and I was trying Western commands. Did not discover this until many embarrassing and quite dangerous moments later! I went to the theater with another coworker and his wife, I went to meet yet another coworker's family and had another invitation to stay in their home for the night and visit some local fairs. I came to love these people for being so sweet to me. I came to see that showing your vulnerability is actually a strength. I looked forward to our lunches at the company cafeteria together, our jokes over morning coffee. They really found a special place inside my heart and I think I in theirs.
Like all wonderful things, this eventually had to come to an end. The company Christmas party was my last hurrah. I guess I had to go out with a bang. I left work a touch early to go home and get changed for the party that was at a fancy place. Of course there ended up being a car accident of some sort completely blocking the road I needed to take to the party. I sat there in standstill traffic FOREVER. Time was ticking, I was soooo late it was once again totally embarrassing. I pulled over to a payphone and tried to call people but had no luck. I had their cell numbers by now but was using a prepaid calling card and after they noticed I was getting to be too late, they all checked their cell phones and saw missed calls from those strange prepaid numbers but had no way of calling back. I finally got there after everyone had already eaten! As I was walking in, a few guys were walking out - on their way to find me. I felt terrible!! But, thankfully - they were just glad I was ok and ordered me some dinner and the party went on!
It was really hard to leave. Three months is just about enough time to get settled and get past your initial concerns and really start living. However, Justin came to visit me at the end of my trip and proposed to me over there! So what a wonderful event to go home and look forward to building our lives together.
If I learned anything, it was that you can do all things through Him who gives your strength. Focus on what is important and the rest of it will fall into place. Be vulnerable, be real. Get to know people not to climb ladders or for your personal gain, get to know them because you want to get to know THEM. I still keep in touch with these people today. They offered for me to stay and work before I left. I joked with the man who had waited for me at the train station that first day of my arrival and he said, "If only we had known then, what we were waiting for.". I went on to do translation work for two men that had side businesses and needed help with English versions of their websites. I went back a few years later with Justin's family and was able to reconnect with a few of these gentlemen that I worked with. I later worked at Detroit Diesel and interacted on a daily basis with Daimler expatriates and their families. I felt like I could empathize so much better with their experiences. Felt like I could connect that much more with my German bosses and colleagues. This trip was such a confidence builder. Sometimes you need to walk the streets of an unknown town all by yourself to collect your thoughts about life in general. Sometimes you need to be away from all of your distractions to really observe God's beauty in this world. Sometimes you need to throw yourself out there - even when you feel really out of place. The rewards are immense. People are what matter and we need to leave our mark by spreading the good that God has placed in our hearts with each other.
(Oh yeah, and as soon as I introduced Justin to the family I was living with - they spoke to him in really good English - the turkeys) ;)
